The Maddogs Cricket club

Normality returned to Mad Dog life this weekend after all of the comfort zone departures of last weekend- well, with one spectacular exception.  The Mad Dogs returned to The Alan Davidson Oval in Sydney Park for the first time this season, the old rules were restored and more importantly the team returned to winning ways.

After the rather harsh regime of 35 over innings each, no bowler or batting limits and the outrage of LBWs and out-first-balls, everyone was pleased to be playing cricket in a pleasant, jovial and social manner once again.  As fierce as the decade-old rivalry between Giles' poms and Seamus' Ashes can be - a rivalry that spawned the Mad Dogs cricket club in the first place - the good natured banter flowed thick and fast.

First innings

This season the Alan Davidson track seemed very unpredictable, and in fact at one end looked more the scene of a small mediaeval battle than a cricket wicket. An early victim of this pitch remarked with surprise as to how one ball rose up high, the next stayed low and did for him.  The conditions were made worse by a very slow out field that was far from generous and throughout the day batsmen would have to hit hard for a boundary.

Initially slow batting from the Mad Dogs picked up and pretty soon successive batsmen sustained a run rate of about 7 runs per over.  Probably the most decisive moment of the first Mad Dogs innings was when JP told his Captain, Seamus, he was going to give spin a try.  The following over he remarked that he might return to pace. Seamus confessed later some outrage at this, that it might have been an option to remain with pace?  The spin experiment, which Seamus assumed was a response to an injury, gifted Sean Garvey the opportunity of three consecutive sixes!  This set up the Mad Dogs innings well - a total of 155 (to which I only able to contribute a four sadly.)

The Mad Dogs were also helped by some dropped catches, including three by their captain, which became a theme for the day.  If catches win matches - both sides were doing their best in a race to defeat!  Another notable theme of the day saw its origins in the first innings - Dogs Captain Giles scored some runs (14)!   The irony was that he was finally caught by Seamus! 

Some loose bowling, mainly from me (although I did find the stumps once I'm pleased to say), yielded slim pickings for The Dogs and an up tempo 20/20 slogging strategy for the Aussies kept them lock step with the maddogs total for the first half of their order - maintaining a run rate of around 6. But as the abuse the Aussie batsmen came under from the pavilion attested, the actual running rate could have been much better, with one Australian remarking at one point that they were only scoring "walks" not runs.

The Aussie batting attack weakened towards the lower order and at lunch they had fallen short of the target by 25 - 155 vs 130 as the sides broke for a BBQ and beers.

Second Innings

As the Maddogs took the field, the opening run rate ticked over fairly mechanically until something very weird happened.

As if to foreshaddow the strange event that was about to take place, an other-worldly, yellowy hue fell across the ground.  The brown grass of the pitch got browner, the cream picket fence around the ground turned more orange and the players were flattered by deeper tans.  The smoke from the Blue Mountains bushfires once again enshrouded Sydney, but as it did so it set the scene well for what can only be explained by supernatural or extra-terrestial activity.

Out to the crease strode a confident looking Giles J Bourne, still cocky from his first innongs performance.  As context, he team joke about Giles was always that while his batting in the nets always seemed relatively effective, he always turned to jelly at the crease, seldom recording a tally of more than 5.  For the founder and President of the club, this was not the example we all looked to him for, but we nevertheless relished the abuse it was able to fuel!

Very quickly though, Giles set about his task with gusto and with a surprising variety of repertoire - confident forward drives, the occasional cut to leg, even pulling square once or twice.  It was a thoroughly professional and competant innings.  Rumours circulated around the pavillion that the real Giles had been kidnapped by aliens - or that we had stumbled into a parrallel universe.  What was going on?  Was this ourGiles?  

I was actually privileged to partner with Giles for the back-end of his historic innings to witness this miracle at first hand - and I quite completely didn't recognise him.  Such assuredness and focus as he went about his business, until eventualy and, by then innevitably, he was retired on 25 and returned to a hero's welcome and a guaranteed place in Mad Dogs legend.

The match wasn't quite the same after that.  The damage was done.  It was if Don Bradman had batted his last innings, or Viv Richards or Brian Lara had just played an unexpected guest appearance.  The rest of the Mad Dogs - with the batting order reversed - continued an aggressive run rate and cantered to a final total of 136, whereupon the Aussies embarked on a challenging run chase of 160 runs.  That task soon seemed insurmountable as the Mad Dogs bowlers, particularly Keith Saunders and Tim Pallet, ripped through the Australian batsmen and somne committed fielding kept the run rate down.  While the propensity for humiliatingly dropped catches continued as before (most notably for poor Mark Harvey whose frustration was turning to madness); the Mad Dogs bowlers' ability to find the stumps with precision was consistent.  By the time I took a quite battered match ball for the final few overs; tired bodies, a dommed run chase and the match itself was heading for a weary and welcome finale.  The Australians managed only 112 meaning a comprehensive win for the Dogs.

So the scene is set for a re-match in March, and plans are made for an early start and a long lunch afterwards, and the Mad Dogs season is back on track with a win and more importantly a return to enjoyable and fun Social cricket.

Before the game could get under way there was some important Mad Dog business to take care of: the distribution of new shirts (modelled stylishly in the photo by Dogs Tim Pallett and Richard Steyn)!  These are the first new shirts the club has had in several years and are adorned by two important symbols. They are decorated by the brand of our new sponsor, so many thanks to Continental Pacific Travel.  But they also debut our new club logo, important because we were at risk of a copyright infringement suit from the New York Mad Dogs, so apologies to them!

For poms playing on both sides this match provided a welcome distraction from the humiliation being inflicted on the national side several hundred kilometres north in Brisbane.  Of course, for Australians playing on both sides, that same backdrop provided tremendous sledging material which they were happy to indulge throughout the day!

A key issue for both sides quickly became obvious as they took the field, the ground was soaked.  Saturated.  In places fully water-logged.  This provided a very slow out field meaning that putting it into the air was the only approach to scoring runs.  Catches were going to be the order of the day.  Furthermore, in places it was pretty hard to cover the ground chasing the ball without finding yourself up-ended in a puddle.  

Maddogs got off to a sluggish start due to the challenging conditions. An early promising cadence declined towards a 4 runs per over run rate until some remarkable batting from treasurer Ed Suttle who helped the score along with some urgency, despite his employ of Brendan as a runner.  After the President's performance in the last game, it was great to see the Treasurer following suit as he retired on 25.  Other retirees in the first innings included Richard Steyn and Sean Garvey (for whom retirement is expected.)  Together the Dogs etched up a first innings total of 123, to which I was able to add 10 before being caught by a brilliant catch towards the boundary at mid-on.  (My exit was a blessing though, as my batting partner Sean Garvey's furious, Broad-like "run-a-ball" competitive ethos did not sit well with my hangover!)

Some great catches from, in particular, President Giles and Treasurer Ed accounted for Newington who were only able to score 99 in their reply.  But while catches were the order of the day, another theme that established itself early was run outs.  Ironically, some scruffy Mad Dog fielding tempted Newington into chasing some illadvised extra runs and some brilliant work from keeper Saunders and part-time keeper Garvey did for a few of the slower Newington runners.  

The Mad Dogs reply started well enough, but got bogged down mid way through when the run rate slumped to just 2. However, strong innings from Garvey, Steyn and Pritchard added another 106 to the score to extend the lead to 129.  (I was once again clean bowled for just 2 while attempting a misguided sweep shot - a lesson I never seem to learn!)

Scoring had got harder though, not only because of the spongey ground but also because the field was now crowded with up to 5 extra fielders; albeit mostly under the age of 7 - a reflection of the heritage of Newington - full name: Newington Fathers. 

Then the stage was set for an exciting finish as Newington chased down the lead. Early wickets gave the Mad Dogs confidence they were to repeat their win in last year's fixture but then a succession of gifted big hitters took to the field and punnished the canine bowling, mine included, and various Mad Dog fielders found themselves having to vault the picket fence after a series of massive sixes.  Suddenly the game was getting away from us.  With 3 overs to go, the required run rate was a very do-able run-a-ball.

However, some tight and effective bowling from Ant Pritchard, Keith Saunders and Sean Garvey ground the Newington run chase to a hault and took a number of important wickets, including that of dangerous Mad Dog turn-coats Jon Gill and Marcus Timpson.  

So Newington fell just short but the banter and the competitive spirit has set this fixture up to be an enjoyable mainstay of the Mad Dogs season and a new rivalry is now born. Speaking of new traditions, Richard Steyn deservedly won a new Man-of-the-match award after he performed excellently with ball, bat and in the field with his usual nonchalence. Richard won a particularly attractive and colourful garden gnome.

(More pictures of the day can be found here, courtesy of Giles Bourne.)

When that dreaded word "Grade" raised its ugly head, we knew we were in trouble.  We don't come across it very often but when we do, it forbodes very badly.  On this occasion though, it was plural - The "Nondescripts" of Camperdown were a whole team of ex-Graders.  Yikes.

It was quickly building as a complete mis-match and we even considered cancelling.  We heard rumours we were in for a kicking and someone in the know who attended one of our nets sessions predicted slaughter when he heard we were playing them.

The situation seemed confirmed when our captain, Tim Carrol, rang their captain to agree on rules.  He explained we have a few "quirky" rules: that you can't be out first ball and that we didn't really respect the Leg Before Wicket rule unless totally plumb.  "Oh, I don't think our bowlers will like that," said the opposition captain.  Turned out he was right.  When the first ball of the day was bowled, it hit our opening batsman plumb on his pads - out.  But the Umpire - our wicket keeper, Keith Saunders - didn't give it.  (His sound reasoning being that with one of our strongest batsmen out first ball - it was likely to be a short game!)  The bowler was far from pleased, visibly aggravated in fact, just as his captain had predicted.  His mood deteriorated further when the same batsman tonked his second ball for four!  "You could have had the good grace to block a few after being out last ball" he said.  Oh dear, we thought, not only was this not going to go well, now there was bad blood.

It often seems that the tone of the match is generally set within the opening moments of arrival and this second match against the Sydney Goons was no exception.  Upon arrival I began to seek some briefing on the opposition - as I had missed the earlier encounter with them.  "They know what they are doing" I was told.  "That's hardly fair" I thought, not really being in the spirit of Maddog cricket.  "Look at the size of them," said another, "they're big guys, likely to give it a bt of tonk."  "Yikes" I thought.

In fact though, as the first innings took shape, I began to feel the Maddogs might have their measure.   Moreover, as our turn in the field reached its final quarter I pondered whether this was one of the better Maddogs performances I had seen.  With several new recruits showing remarkable promise, our bowling attack was reassuringly tight and consistent.  Wickets fell pretty regularly, and there were sharply executed run-outs and impressive catching and some excellent wicket keeping from Welshman Mark Harvey.  All round we kept their first innings total to a clipped 113 and put on a fairly solid 94 ourselves (with no particular help from me who openedthe batting as well as the bowling!)  So at the half way point, the affair was well balanced.

But then the tables turned.  As the heat piled up the Maddogs tired, and with the Goons having cleverly stacked their batting order in reverse so their strongest batsmen came out in the second half, the lead grew at a rapid rate.  The size of some of their big hitters was brought to bear on what was a slightly scruffier bowling effort from us - well, specifically from me - and the runs mounted.  You could say they made hay while the sun shone.  In fact, a chap called Hay particularly did, and another chap named Struggles...didn't.  Overs were expensive, and wickets weren't falling, and several of them retired on 20.  Soon their lead was something in the order of 160-odd.  In 20 overs, and a run rate ranging from 8 to 9 per over, this seemed something of an ask.

But while some of us were down-hearted our debut captain, Anthony Cheshire, led from the front, taking the field with a sense of purpose and racking up an impressive 15 himself as several Dogs batted aggressively and with some urgency.  Not least of which was urstwhile-Goon-turned-Maddog Marcus Timpson (who played for them on the last outing).  What seemed an unsurmountable target slowly but steadily became more and more do-able.  Although we ultimately came up some 30 runs short when the overs ran out, both Dogs and Goons were surprised the affair ended as close as it did.  

With a hint of Dunkirk about it, what could have been an inglorious kicking to finish the season ended up something approacing a moral victory and leaves the Dogs in excellent spirit for the end of season dinner in May.  Bring on next season!

(More photos here)

Match report: Mad Dogs vs. Bronte Stingers

16/12/12 - by Ed (Watto) Watson

(Before I even start the angriest and venomous player of the Dogs is writing this report so feel free to remove the spite and malice from the following words)

On a searingly hot day at the renowned HQ of the “Dogs” the team was assembled on paper it was looking pretty solid with depth in bowling and some good sluggers throughout the line up. It did however not present itself as the backbone free invertebrate that is proved to be as the day wore on.

Cutler appeared late with daughter in one hand and quarter pounder in other.  Consistency is an important part of his pre-match routine so we were all really glad that he had a fag in hand before the ¼ pounder was finished. Stunning preparation.

Anyway, Sean Garvey, our resolute skipper, tossed the first coin and called heads…Upon further inspection the coin did not actually have a head on it and was found to herald from some far flung planet in a galaxy far away and so we had to tell Luke his money was worthless here and got a valid 20 cent piece from someone else. We won the toss and decided to bat….ERROR…ERROR….ERROR

The pitch has suffered from dew in the morning and heat later on. It was like batting on “Glue track”. Luckily Chris Tavere and Geoff Boycott had bee re-incarnated in the form of Anthony Cheshire and he opened the batting like it might have been a timeless test…. (More of a timeless test of his own teams patience) but anyway he maidened his way to 8 off 28 balls...nice) Luke nibbled around for a few until wickets tumbled. TC slugged his way with some finesse to 19. Jez, Ed and Garvs failed. Redeeming feature of the early afternoon was Mark Harvey appearing with his bird who didn’t mind any chat about “playing the back 9”. We all warmed to her immediately and asked if she may play instead of Harvs next time. Motion passed unanimously. Cutler came in and slapped a few full bungers onto the hill and then started claiming he actually is a “real” cricketer.  Hmmm…even the lovely Estelle rolled her eyes as he whistled down another couple of tabs and pure blondes…(one of which he showed us on his I-Phone – amazing what Photoshop ca do these days!) We stifled our way to 103 and then set about bowling to defend it…….

A few early breakthroughs and some decent bowling from Luke and Nick’s well played offies restricted them to 130. They had some resident of “The Shire” that bilbo’ed his way to 20 and was to prove a real hand brake for us throughout the day. They didn’t find the pitch as hard as us. We blamed the gay pink ball, the arrangement of the planets, age, beers and nostra Damas. And yet these ac-TORS raced past us. They South African blaster hit a few and we were sent back in to over turn the lead and set a target. ….

This time the openers realized the format and both retired on 20 after about 6/7 overs. Well batted JP and “old school” Dave from Shore.  TC again whacked more valuable runs, Jez retired and we looked set to get stuck in. Cutler ran himself out, Marcus looked a little out of place so was give out off the 7^th ball in the over so as to limit the damage. Our own umpires even struggled to count to 6 so reparations needed to be made by sympathetic minds at the other end….Spirit of the game is alive and well. We got some useful runs at the end with Chesh and Luke going at a run a ball..(Rather than a run a day!)

So we were left to defend a lead of 102 after finishing our second dig at 135. Everyone thought it was 20 short and everyone was right.

We just weren’t able to squeeze them when we needed to and every over contained a boundary or a no-ball that got thumped for 4. “Old School” Dave was on song, Garvey tried to restrict it and Ed Watson just got more pissed off. We had some useful stumpings from TC’s off-dollies  and the catch at deep cow by me wasn’t too bad. The second one I dropped would have been better but I dropped it. TWAT. The result was always going away from us even though they didn’t know the no-ball rule on double bouncers we can safely say we didn’t justify our existence out there and were beaten by a team that simply made the game we were trying to play a lot easier by doing the simple things well. (Staying on the fence, not bowling no-balls and scoring quickly). However the day was thoroughly enjoyable and the weather held. Why we rolled out the covers and then had to out it back afterwards will remain a mystery. We weren’t to know the pitch would be as tricky as it was but we certainly could have done better than we did and it will be a real pleasure having another pop at these guys and getting the result we all felt we had in us.

The next game is on Jan 13th against the Northern force where a few players will change allegiance. The team remains strong and the banter and character continues to flourish. Cricket is still the winner.

By Tim Carrol

The band from the north travelled south in two cars, depleted in numbers with 8 in total with a few current Mad Dogs and a few cricketing friends including a young gun - Tom who Chan magnificently picked out at deep mid-wicket after a very handy knock....

The Force had a Welsh injection in the shape of MR "I want to get involved skipper" Harvey....

The Mad Dog youth policy supplemented our ranks with Rory & Milo who both had great debuts

The Toss - The native Bourne sporting new mujahedeen look tossed the coin, TC decided that despite overcast conditions it would be worth having a bat and setting a total ....

Photos here on Dropbox.

The Force's Knock

We opened with Jared and Spellers - Luke and JP opened well bowling good line and length...

Luke was rewarded bowling Jared the Force 29-1 with Spellers batting well, he was joined by a fellow Irishman Johnno who, like last year, displayed excellent hand eye co-ordination stepping backing and hitting some lusty blows that would have been at home in the big bash. Johnno quickly moved to 23 before hitting a big six to retire before Spellers joined him retired back at the pavilion. Watto in next hitting 25 including some good blows, was surprised by a handy spell by Chan who varied his pace to good effect but managed to make it to the shed retired. Tom in next hit 19 before being caught off a full bunger. Jez & TC showed a bit of form the latter regretting a four pines induced hangover. Both we're dismissed in identical fashion - bowled Lewis caught Chan well induced by some good sledging from keeper and 1st slip. The opening 6 had compiled a good healthy total supplemented by a late cameo from Mark Harvey getting a quick-fire 14 including a big six. With Milo and Rory tickling a few runs at the end, the Force had set a total of 185-6 off 30 overs. The Mad Dogs had dropped 8 catches in total and a big run chase was required. It would have been interesting to have seen what the total would have been with a few more catches.

In summary the Mad Dogs bowled well, the force batted well and the fielding was more Monty Panesar than Jonnty Rhodes. Good spells from Chan 5 overs for 15 and promising debut from Paul 1-29 and Lewis 2-22.

The Mad Dogs riposte

JP and Chan opened - Spellers bowled 3 overs of brisk left arm round going for 5 off 3 overs and had both bats in trouble. Both stuck to task and with Spellers bowling so tightly they picked on Watto's bowling slapping him for a couple of boundaries off a good length which he is still pi&@ed off about. JP was first out from memory nicking one off Chris. Chan was retired following a good bowling display with a good knock. Richard Steyn grafted before being well caught down the leg side. Richard Ansell had a good knock before being well stumped by Jez who had an accomplished day behind the stumps…..also executing an athletic run out. I (TC) bought myself on to open the game up and was duly dispatched to the four corners of the ground by Ed Suttle and Keith with Ed notching his highest score for the mad dogs of 24. Despite being expensive TC picked up the wicket of the opposing skipper a rare straight one pitched up did the trick - I did have two chances dropped including one by Mr Harvey who specifically requested a fielding position where he would get some action. He duly put the chance down 2 balls later. Other notable mentions - Sri Lankan Chris 5 overs 2-18, Watto's direct hit from deep mid-on. Johnno got the high wide of the match, but bearing in mind it was the first time he had ever bowled in a game was impressive. Both Rory and Milo bowled well with Rory in particular picking up two consecutive wickets with Chan being caught by Tom on the boundary and was on a hat trick ball. Tidy bowling and some good fielding by Force.

The Mad Dogs all out for 134 and shy of the total.  A fun game and one that was finished just before the heavens opened. Thanks to all those who helped organise.

It is known as The Colosseum - mainly because of its shape and a chequered history of inhospitable crowds and poor odds for visiting teams - but the first time I saw Calcutta's Eden Gardens about 15 years ago, I dared to dream that one day I might see England play there.  Through a quirk of fate, that dream came true last month, and it did not remotely disapoint.  Not only has the cricket been tremendously enjoyable - including fine performances from two of the world's greatest test batsmen- but the atmosphere has been electric, just as I imagined.

Getting to the ground was more than a challenge. Because of the heat, and unlike most test cricketing nations that kick off around 11am, Test matches in India begin at 9am, so we failed to get there on time due to an abject inability to read the small print on the tickets.  That failure was even more punnishing when we got there to be told that cameras of any kind were "not permitted" (something else mentioned on the tickets) and so we had to walk back to the hotel to leave them behind.  Although only a short 20 minute walk, that walk took us through the Calcutta Bus Station - easily the worst square half mile I've ever been in, full of the most putrid smells and rotten filth and fraught with the danger of traffic and the sad sights of tiny, often injured and certainly destitute puppies.  

Finally we made it along to the ground, and were soon put upon by one of the stranger invasions of privacy I've experienced.  It is often said that one of the problems with India is that you can find yourself being stared at by a crowd people as you go about your business.  This annoyance reached new heights as a TV camerman parked himself infront of us as we watched the cricket and trained his lense on us...for about 10 minutes.  After 10 minutes he relaxed his tired arm, but instead of walking away or focussing on the cricket as we hoped he might; he instead called up his tripod carrier so he could film us some more without effort!  We weren't entirely sure why we drew so much attention, but we eventually concluded it was True-Aussie Terresa's "I love India" hat!

While Terresa made her colours clear, I too had ended up accidently wearing my sympathies on my sleave - literally.  On the way to the ground a chap offered to paint the St George Cross on my arm.  I said "no" but he refused to listen and did it anyway.  However, the badly painted white and blood-red cross led most people to just think I had sustained an injury!

The first day we cooked in the hot Calcutta sun, ironic of course as England's Captain is named Alistair Cook.  England accounted for themselves well and held India to 270-odd at stumps, taking the crucial wicket of Sachin Tendulkar well short of the century his adoring fans had hoped for.  We made it along in the afternoon for the second day and by then England had bowled out India for a modest 316 and were well on the way to a controlling first innings total with the Captain and opener on the way to a century of his own.

Yet at times - in this ground well known for its riots and once referred to as a "Cauldron" (by Bob Willis - one of the only English 11 to win here) - various incidents of crowd insanity were far more compelling than the genteel events at the crease.  The ground certainly boasts the noisiest and fastest Mexican Wave of any I've been in.  The Barmy army -  who usually command any ground they visit - had been strangely silent on day one and, I suspect, probably didn't expect to be spending the day in a "dry" ground. By Day two, however, they were far more rowdy - had they all found a creative way to smuggle in alcohol I wondered?  But pretty soon the Indians had crowded out their area and at times drowned out their tunes - I've seen the barny army quiet, but never silenced.  Luckily they had brought a trumpet which certainly helped.

Most of all though, the adulation for the "Little Master", Sachin Tendulkar, is beyond hero worship. Whenever he was posted to the boundary to field, the crowd flocked to meet him like so many moths to a flame. In fact the crowd followed him to such a degree soldiers were deployed to manage them wherever Sachin went to field, often getting crushed against the fencing in their efforts.  The sheer noise of their excitement at his very presence was indeed deafening and always detracted from the cricket.  In fact, noise and heat were - as I had expected 15 years before - the overwhelming aspects of this experience.  Very few people could concentrate at the crease against the din raised on Sharma's run up or when Trott faced his first ball.  But - I am happy to say - England proved solid and unswayable on their way to their first victory here since the 70s and ultimately their first series win in India in 28 years.

Our Eden Gardens adventure ended as it had began - on the TV.  A TV interview for both of us on our exit of the ground about our views on the match.  I said that I thought England might win, Aussie Terresa proudly declared she hoped India would!

By James Corbishley

Sydney - 18th November 2012

Another stunning spring morning greeted the Mad Dogs and Aussies at the Alan Davidson oval for the first match of the latest Ashes series. Rain had threatened to keep the pitch wet but 24 hours of no rain saw all the excess water drain away, providing a lush green outfield ready for action. The wicket was in decent shape, if a little damp, but the North Easterly gusts would soon take off the moisture and provide excellent conditions for a great day. 

(Link to Dropbox Photo Album of the day)

Captain Bourne tossed well for the Dogs who eagerly picked up the mantle to face first. Some decent pace from the Aussie bowlers on the moist wicket saw a tentative start from the Mad Dogs for the first few overs. It wasn’t helped by a slow and sticky outfield and a quick high catch taking the 1^st Dog Steyn for single figures, but then a very solid partnership took shape between Timmo and Cutler, with Marcus giving the new bad-boy-bat a proper knocking in by spanking 6&4 consecutively. Both ended retiring with 20+ runs under their belts to give the Dogs an excellent start. The Dogs continued a slower pace, with the Aussie’s firing some fine balls down the line and this slowed the running down considerably with some great legside fielder positioning taking TC and Garvs out of the picture.  Ed W came in to pick up the pace and hammer more sixes over the Aussie’s heads, alongside TP, showing tenacity from the middle order to stick around until retirement. The tail enders Bourne, Corbo and Suttle found some more runs in the last few overs, with another couple over the fence and to the boundary to give the Mad Dogs a very respectable 133 to chase from 20 overs, with 4 retirees.

Out came the Aussie’s batsmen to face the Dogs in their first innings. I’m not sure anyone expected what was to come over the next 90 mins. Ed W started the assault with two excellent outswingers, both clipped and caught by the keeper to take the first two Aussie openers for single figures and it would have been a hat trick but for the free hit rule. Whilst Keith kept the Aussie’s in check with some decent spins from the South, in came ‘Pallet the Mallet’ – smashing straight down the middle to see the bails flying  twice, whilst all the time the Mad Dog fielders had the eye, firing the leather back into base and keeping the runs between stumps a one way affair.  The Aussie batters found some form with awesome slogs over Cover and Mid Wicket almost taking out a bicycle and it’s 4 year old rider but then Suttle provided a suitably “subtle” ball which was hit by one of the Aussie big hitters and caught in the outfield by a superb diving catch by Garvs, the first of a few to come. The Timpson spin came into play, bring out another two spectacular catches deep out in the field, before Garvs came up to the wicket and produced a stunning display of athleticism by a double bowl and catch effort, one caught whilst sprawled on the floor with outstretched fingertips.  Cutler finished the last Aussie big hitter off with another excellent bowl and catch effort before the last Aussie tailers were caught by the safe hands of the Dogs. Too easy! All out for 94.

Snags and Beers were consumed rapidly, before Round 2 kicked off. The Mad Dogs were keen to seize the opportunity and raise the run rate to make the target very difficult for the Aussie’s, but the reverse battling order and some fine bowling and fast hands meant wickets were taken quickly and if it hadn’t been for the Mad Dog Secret Weapon, aka ‘Slog Master’ Jon Gill sitting tight until retirement it might have been an early collapse. Corbishley went out for a dumb duck by running himself out (what a tool) and it seems the Dogs were a bit too keen on scampering about, getting run out on three occasions. Ed W and Garvs then solidified things in the middle, rising the tally again until Garvs retirement. The score was rattled up again nicely with The Tim’s providing a few extra notches before “3 beers Cutler” was out for a glittering quack (I thought it was a free ball!). Tail ender Steyn finished off with the resurrected retiree Gill for another sterling performance raising his total to 32 for the innings. 40 overs done and dusted. 249 run total for the Dogs. NICE.

It seemed a daunting task for the Aussies from the outset. 150+ from 20 overs would be a very nice score on a good day but they were immediately cut to ribbons by Cutler who took two bowled wickets in the first few overs to make it very difficult for recovery. Again the two Aussie Big Hitters did themselves proud and achieved retirement age, and the middle order racked up some singles but it was too little too late with some fine MD spin bowling and brilliant fielding keeping things firmly under control and producing some superb catches for the outfield yet again. The young Mad Pups came out for the final 3 overs bowling, and a perfectly pitched final ball of the day from Mini-Marcus Eddie got a plum LB and produced a wicket for a very happy and smiley lad. Top effort! After the final 20 overs the Aussies did hit over a ton for a day’s total of 203, but nowhere near the Mad Dogs. Man of the match for me was Garvs with all-rounder excellence, and more green on his whites than anyone else to prove it.

It turned out to be a day to go down in history as the best Mad Dogs performance that can be remembered for some time, if not ever. What where the secrets to this success? Was spring in the air perhaps? Was it the new $500 bat? Was it the Sterling captaincy from Mr Bourne bringing flair and cunning to the proceedings by sending in the spin doctors Marcus, Keith and Ed to dealing out some nasty, slow poisonous medicine into the wind from the South end and keeping the medium pacers attacking from the North? The Mad Dogs hangover percentile certainly seemed remarkably low compared to usual ratings – perhaps worth noting for future? Perhaps not… 

I reckon a little bit of all of that came together yesterday. Whatever it was, it was a day of first grade cricket from the Mad Dogs. As Seamus the Aussie Captain phrased it, “Catches Win Matches”, but not only did we have the Catches, but blistering bowling and solid, stalwart batting to boot. A combination that meant only one thing for the Mad Dogs – GLORY! 

I knew we were in trouble the night before at a party when the captain told me that I was one of only two specialist bowlers and as such, great things were expected of me. This gave me tremendous cause for concern.  Not least because I am only considered a "specialist bowler" because I can't bat!  It was likely to be, I was told, the weakest maddogs side ever fielded.  Yikes.

Limited selection options were only one of our problems as it turned out.  Not only had the opposition captain attended all of our Nets practice sessions and thereby appraised our strengths and weaknesses awfully well; but they had - since our last meeting - recruited several very strong players including one first-grader!  On the morning of the match, four of us struggled to the ground the victims of nasty but self-inlicted tequila hangovers from the 40th birthday the night before.  My own hangover hindered my running between the wickets, as it turned out, causing me to be run out for only 3 runs after facing only 5 balls.

Our selection options turned quickly into an injury epidemic leaving us quite weak in the field after Anthony Cheshire pulled up quite early in the piece as his perennial calf injury returned leaving him quite one-legged.  Moreover our Treasurer Ed Suttle appeared still lame after a violent altercation with one of his prize bulls more than a year ago.  At one point this left me nominated to cover half the pitch should anything slip through our perforated slip defence.  Eventually we were forced to draft in children to do the running for us.  Never had the Maddogs felt quite so old.

This match saw experimentation with new rules - henceforth to be known as the Newington Rules - where a 35 over game is reconfigured to be two back to back 20/20 matches, or like a mini test match.  Sadly our first innings saw a fairly mediocre total of 102 after strong batting from Richard Steyen and most surisingly an unprecendented 15 from our drink-addled captain and club president, Giles Bourne.

It quickly became apparent that our 102 was not much of a target for the Newington lot who began their chase down with much gusto, ultimately reaching 134 in the alloted 20 overs before we broke for a sausage sizzle.  Great expectations of my bowling the night before were sorely disapointed in the first innings, with the only positive of my first 12 balls being that they exercised all of our fielders as their batsmen peppered all corners of the ground with them.  Adding to that the catch I dropped and I've learnt a painful lesson about the preparation virtues of tequila, or lack there of.

So back into bat we went, only this time reversing the order as these new fangled rules dictated.  My second innings was even worse than the first - caught on only two runs. (Pathetically, those two runs were only achieved by slightly touching a wayward ball as it sailed over my head.)  My running between wickets was confused not only by an alcohol impaired brain, but also because Ed Suttle came on with a runner - the highly enthusiastic Welshman Mark Harvey.  So I kept looking for Ed to run only to suddenly realise Mark had already set off and was nearly at my end! 

When my wicket quickly fell, on came our other walking wounded, Anthony Cheshire, requesting his own runner.  This of course led to untold comedy as with two batsmen, two runners and the Maddog umpires also on the field, half the team was out on the field, if not actually in as such.  I declined the role of runner for Anthony - the confusion was too much for me.  

Suffice it to say though, our run chase was greatly impaired by our various inadequcies and we managed to add only another 99.  Luckily Newington couldn't seem to catch for toffee or it could have been much worse.   So we left them an easy 60-odd run chase which they were able to achieve with very little resistance and five overs to spare.  A well deserved victory that from the very outset never really seemed in doubt.

You can enjoy pictures of the day here, with credits to Giles for his photographic sense of occasion.

It's traditional to list out the honors but on this day, perhaps the darkest in Maddgs hostory, it is a shrted list than usual. There were terrific catches by Mssrs Garvey and Harvey and very strong batting performances by Tim Pallett and Sean Garvey, not to mention a superb all round effort by Richard Steyen.  I did manage a double-wicket over myself - putting me briefly and excitingly on a hat trick at one point - thereby mitigating my other poor contributions I like to think.  

Probably the most important efforts of the day were those by our newly-blooded "MadPups" Charlie and Jamie who put in stirling fielding accomplishments for which they were rewarded by an over each bowlng - which also showed great promise for the future.

But on balance the experiemnet with the new Newington Rules seemed a great success and we hope to employ them again at our next match - Ashes I.  Go the Dogs!